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Sydney Backpackers! Dorms Do’s and don’ts!

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GUY BACKPACKERS THIS IS FOR YOU;

DON’T:

        • Leave your dirty underwear all over the floor. Or your dirty anything for that matter.
        • Leer at the lovely lady as she tries to (discreetly) undress for the shower
        • Have sex with random girls on the bunk above her. Way to make her feel special!
        • Talk about your recent conquests/various other ‘lad’ behaviour in front of her. No matter how much this impresses the boys in your dorm, it will have the opposite effect on the ladies.
  • Fart/burp publicly
  • Snore like a rhino
  • Sleep naked. No matter how hot your body is, no girl wants it on show all night in a Sydney backpackers when you kick the sheet off in your sleep. No walking around the dorm naked (unless you’re Brad Pitt)
  • Stumble into her bed at 4 am no matter how ‘accidental’.
  • Stare at her boobs while engaged in conversation with her. She has eyes and she knows exactly what you’re thinking.
  • Bench-press/perform any other gym routine on the dorm apparatus. You will not impress her.
  • Forget her name.
  • Mistake her for her friend
  • Add/poke/inundate her with facebook messages and emails 2 minutes after arriving in your new Sydney hostel
  • Eat your post-night-out donner kebab inside the hostel room at 4 am

DO:

  • Treat her like a lady. Manners will get you a long way.
  • Keep your stuff tidy
  • Smell fresh. No one wants to get into a bed that smells like a farmyard.
  • Make conversation. Look interested in what she’s saying and remember what she tells you.
  • Put the toilet seat down.
  • Be hygienic – it goes a long way!

GIRL BACKPACKERS – YOUR TURN

DON’T:

  • Snore/burp/fart
  • Talk about bodily functions/toilet habits
  • Have sex with random guys on the bunk above (unless you want to become the token dorm bicycle)
  • Get drunk and cry/bitch/talk for hours about your ex or, even worse, do it sober.
  • Pass out like a drunken mess on the dorm floor (depending on the type of guy you’re trying to impress
  • Hangover-vomit on the dorm floor. The ‘Damsel in distress’ routine doesn’t work when it’s self-inflicted.
  • Talk about anything to do with that special time of the month or even worse leave those items lying about.
  • Leave your hair/dirty makeup wipes on the floor. No guy wants to know how much effort that ‘sultry’ look took last night.
  • Wake him up every morning with your rustling of numerous plastic bags.
  • Make fun of him unless he knows it’s only banter. Humour can be lost in translation and you may end up hurting his pride.
  • Walk around in your bra and knickers – although the boys will love it, it’ll send off the wrong message

DO:

  • Behave like a lady
  • Make conversation and make sure the topic isn’t solely girl-related/all about yourself.
  • Pretend to be interested in whatever sport/activity he’s chatting to you about
  • Be sociable and get involved in drinking games. No one likes the early-night book reader. You are in a Sydney hostel for goodness sake!

Let him perve a little bit. We’re talking a little bit out-of-shower wandering in your towel/bikini.

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